Gabe's Pee-Wee Shindig!

Oh, hello there. Lets just resume as if I haven't been absent here for over a year ;)
My only son turned five this weekend.
It was the best day, from first waking to hittin the sack.
I had grand dreams of painting all the characters of Pee-Wee's playhouse, recovering an old armchair and transforming it into Chairy, making a full on Pee-Wee photobooth, tailoring a men's grey suit waaaay down to fit Gabriel, creating a bullseye game with a picture of Pee-Wee's nemesis, Francis, on it and so much more....
but you know what? I'm learning to slow down a lot. I'm learning to balance my life in a way that I don't miss out on the relational opportunities because I'm so busy in my adult version of coloring or playtime. I'm glad I kept it simple. There was a whole lotta life I would've missed on this wonderful day if I had not simplified..........

My sister got here early to help me by making the cupcakes and a cake. While I was taking a shower a glass shattered everywhere and she had to toss the batter! I came out to find my sister gone, no cake and 30 minutes til the party. This cake was literally a whip up and by the time she got back with store bought cupcakes I had it neatly displayed. Still pattin myself on the back on this one ;)

My sister went utterly crazy on spoiling this boy. She bought him every last character from the playhouse on ebay and some of the vintage merchandise. We waited till after the party to give him the rest because we both know that other people's kids have not been trained in proper toy handling. 

He was so appreciative of everything and very impressed! I would usually stay up late working on party things to surprise my kids but losing sleep isn't in line with trying to find balance. It added more dimensions of fun to this with letting him be a part of the planning and occasionally "helping". He was so proud to show his friends!

Yep. 

These two were here. My heart still overflows with the joy from this day....

My parents came.

This was my mom's first meeting......

I know mom. Me, too.....

Cara came out and worked her face painting and balloon magic free of charge.

She didn't want payment but I noticed several who love her practically shoving an offering in her pockets ;) I said to her, "The best advice I can give you is never, ever turn down your blessing." 

She's one of my favorite people.....

Oh, how happy he was with every gift! Nando even bought him a toy and labeled it 

To: Kurt Cobain  (Gabe hates him to call him that. Not because he has any notion of who he is but rather because he wants to be called Pee-Wee)

Emily wanted to rep Sailor Moon but after being continually cut in front of in Cara's line we took matters into our own hands. Looking into her face with total justification for this long was heaven....

I was so present in this moment, 

if I close my eyes now I can still picture her there....

When people asked if they could bring anything, I just replied "Silly String!"

Little boy, you just don't know how much you are loved.

Happy Birthday, my son......

Quiet makes me talk

I'ts really quiet here. Everyone's in bed and Jerome's at his evening job. I blog in my head all the time, every day. Bloggers will understand that perfectly. I'm here all of a sudden and don't want to make a big fuss of it so I'm not going to edit this post. My grammar sucks pretty badly anyhow so it won't be noticeable......

I spend a lot of time alone.

 I spend most of my time alone. 

Well, there's always Gabe. I call him my constant companion. He's my closest friend :) 

I'm in my head too much when I'm hermiting. I notice that the more I fade from social media the more invisible I become to others in real life. I like it. 

I like Instagram, lately. It's really a lot to blame for my blogless life. I love that I can post a moment and move on. But you know what? I haven't used my camera in almost a year. That's not a good thing. 

I have been disappointed so much lately after putting my heart into people and projects that I have lost desire. For people. For projects. I am jaded and just want to do me and my family. That's not a good thing. 

I've had the weirdest theories and made some reaching parallels about my favorite movie, Labrynth. (introvercy will do that) 

Jareth tempts Sarah to "forget about the baby" and immerse herself in his crazy upside down world. In my own life I tried for years to "forget" while immersing myself in a crazy, upside down world of my own making. I met many twisted characters like in the movie,  some merely foolish and harmless but others who would have no qualms with seeing the worst happen to me. I could write about the parallels all night but my eyes hurt. I couldn't forget the baby and that's what matters.

I miss being here. I miss wanting to be here. This was my place. 

Take care, though I can't imagine anyone would be hanging around. 

And randomly, I just wonder about Eartha Kitsch all the time. I hope she is well. She put a hundred smiles on my face in a tough season. 

I leave you with a random picture of us on the first day of school. Gabe was caught mid sneeze. You're welcome ;)

The Minimalist Game

This is where I'm at today.  It's come a long way from a few moths back and I realize that it's really not that horrendous for the American standard of living.

 But what is all this crap?

Of course, I know what it all is. I can even tell you exactly where I picked it up, how little I paid, the conversation I had with the person involved in the transaction, etc etc.....

But like what does all this crap mean to me?

That's where I'm at.

And I'm finding it means a little too much.

 So I've joined Mason and Brian in a month long endeavor called

"The Minimalist Game".

On the first day you get rid of one thing, the second day two things, third day three things and so on and so on. My first item was perfect in this practice of "loosening" the grip we have on stuff.

My friend asked me if I had any vintage shirts I didn't want and I went to my closet and gave her one I am extremely attached to. So much that I won't even wear it and it more honor than any scrap of material has any right to. I gave that shirt more consideration than I do people's feelings and needs sometimes. That sounds a little dramatic but that is the honest truth.

 And ironically,

the shirt I thought I treasured so much has never shined more brighter ;)

 

Box castle for days........

We're stayin close to home this summer and it's all about creating fun and FREE outlets from boredom. The kids will never own another handheld gaming device as long as I've got a say in it (they had a Leapster for a week and nearly killed each other) and there's only so many movies they can watch before good old fashioned mom guilt sets it.

The box castle we all made last week has been a constant source of play.

It's like the kiddie water cooler, they're always gathered around it. 

Watching little man work out his artistic expressions has been the best part of it.

He's always been a whirling dervish who's never been keen on sitting long enough to create anything.

It's good to see him settling a bit......

 Ava said this is her and a teenager. They're always talking about these mythical teenagers, lately. Remember bein little and standing in awe of teenagers? And then you grow up and realize most of the ones you thought were teens were really like 10 years old? ;)

Summer Treasures and BOWIE

With Jerome workin two jobs to float this ship I don't spend the way I used to lookin for second hand treasures. A few months went by that I didn't even stop in to any and I honestly didn't miss it.

But now that the kids are homebound for summer break we're all itchin to get out once in awhile.

Some people go on real vacations and trips but we're just not there yet. One day! ;)

I thought about The Goodwill Geek on this one. If he ever admits to liking vintage Avon perfume bottles it'll be on it's way up north.

 And I've always wanted a new one of these soft llamas!! When I was little my granny gave me an old family of them that must have been from the 60's and I literally loved them to shreds. This one's a newer one I'm sure but only cost me a buck :)

 I had to grab this guy from Spirited Away for a special someone who's going to be 14 soon ;)

I've been squirreling away a little bundle this past year for her. Do any of you have little hamster piles tucked away for other's birthdays and such? I have so many in so many different spots that I often leave some gifts out on accident. If I ever sent you anything I guarantee that I missed a couple of your things! I've found several things I meant to send off at Christmas.....

 

 And of course this found it's way over here.

I never set out to be but somehow it just crept up on me.

I'm a Ziggy fan. And this cup sums up my whole being.

 And this retro southwestern frog scrub brush holder (what a mouthful)

sums up my whole house. Don't be jealous.

 Records are not around so much in the usual places I notice.

Today when I was checkin a fresh stack I figured out why I probably hardly see them anymore.

I had just crouched down to thumb through the box and this dude comes up and just hovers over me. I thought he may have been you know, a little slow or something, so I just ignored his presence. Then I notice him trying to get these blue latex gloves on and I really look at him. He just stares right back at me with an intense look. And then his wife comes up and rubs his shoulders and says "Good luck, honey."
HA!! I could barely control my urge to chuckle!

I may or may not have bought a few extra ones that I would have left just because I sensed he would get them. I may or may not be a crappy person just like a lot of other folks ;)

Here's a few that I got today....

 Styx!!!

 Ummm, just because they will make awesome gifts for a certain Ms. Jones ;)

 AND OMG BECAUSE I ONLY EVER RESERVE AN OMG FOR THE MOST AWESOME OCCASIONS (bearing in mind, the "G" for me means "gorgonzola")

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Yes.

It's totally disgusting cover actually has black mold inside it and I had to wipe mold off the record before playing it.

But it's beautiful.

And I may feel a little sick and queasy since messing with it.

But it's Bowie, man.

 

 P.S. The Trash Man made me be a blogger again by announcing that I was back to documenting.
Thanks for speakin what wasn't into existence, buddy ;)

 



This Sunday

This Sunday........

 

 I woke up with a renewed desire for working with children. I woke up with the idea that one night of our bi-weekly gatherings I would spend with the children instead of in adult discussion. I mulled it over for about a minute or two and then made the mental decision to say YES to this idea.And once I said yes, a peace and excitement filled me up.

In our nursery classroom we set about teaching the lesson packet that is provided for us.

It's the usual Sunday school type stuff, today being baby Moses. Of course we emphasize on the fact that there were great big alligators in that river he floated. Now that's a story ;)

We ask a simple question, "Are you a big brother or sister?"

Then a regular day in nursery becomes something else.....

"I have a big brother. He had to move to grandma's and I miss him", says one tiny girl who's visiting for the first time. Her eyes are welled with tears.

"I'm a big sister, my mommy's having a baby! My daddy's in jail for yelling at my mommy and I miss him", says little friend who I absolutely adore. 

"The cops came to my house because daddy was yelling at my mom", says Gabe's little buddy......

 

You know, it's just life. Church is full of people who are living a life just like everyone else. From the outside it appears like a country club where all the happy shiny people meet up to exhort each other in their good deeds. I used to believe the same way. And now I know that it is the farthest thing from reality.

So what do you say to a room full of little children who open up like this? There isn't anything in today's lesson about daddy's in jail or brothers who have left you without notice.....

You just pause for a beat, you close your eyes and give God the heart signal.

"Hey, I trust you. Please say what they need."

And you tell them you and Mr. Jerome fight, too, sometimes. When they open their little mouths in shock, you assure them it is true, all mommy's and daddy's fight sometimes. And sometimes they yell. But you know what, it's not about you at all. It makes you feel sad and scared and you really think you did something to make them upset but mommy's and daddy's are having a hard time in this world and it makes them overwhelmed. But you are their treasure, the best thing they've got and they love you.......

You know, we don't judge those parents. We have been there. Of course on a less dramatic scale these days but we are currently in and out of these moments ourselves and are teaching our kids the same thing.  And it amazes me that what we are growing in at home was needed for our little friends.

 

This Sunday,

 God confirmed a dream in my heart to work peace into the little people's lives.

And I say yes.

 

 

Get my heart right and maybe my photos back

A moment of honesty is due.

We open our home for two gatherings a week for fellowship and such and to be completely real I just wasn't feelin it. To put it simply, I just felt overwhelmed. I'm a natural introvert BUT I love people.

I love to see people grow, overcome life's punches and my favorite thing is to see people punch life right back. Like right smack in the face, just give it all you got kind of punches. That's when I feel the most alive and most filled up with good stuff.

But then I need a break from other breathing and viable beings. Like as much time as I spend being Mick and Paulie with you in your corner, I need double that time to recuperate and be alone. It's like muscle recovery for an introvert. And in that downtime if I'm not spending any authentic moments of intimacy with God, it's like I'm sleeping on a straw cot. I go through the motions of "rest" but I never ever feel rejuvenated. Today I shared my heart with Jerome and he said the single best thing he's ever said to me.....

"It doesn't matter how much good you do, Laura. You aren't spending time with Him and that's why you aren't being renewed."

Yep.

He's totally right. And then he went on to tell me stuff like "What are you gonna do about that?" and I was all, "Ok, that's enough. Stop while you're ahead!" ;)

Every time I feel like he's just not there for me enough, he reminds me just how much he is ALWAYS  there. In the ways no one could ever be.......

And on a completely different note,

I'm just sitting here wondering why I've had traffic over here from a singles meetup site called browsemypics.com...... Creep-AY. I've had my identity stolen before for a couple of credit cards and I've experienced a lady who saved my personal photos off facebook to use as her profile pictures on a local sale site so it wouldn't surprise me to find out I've got some weird dating profile set up by a stranger out there. There is a reason the root word of stranger is "strange".....

Anyhow, if it's any of you guys who actually read this little slice of internet, would you kindly rethink that? And if it's not the case at all, then don't mind my suspicion ;)